Friday, May 4, 2007

Spider-Man 3 is an anti-emo propaganda film

In "Spider-Man 3," Spidey puts on the black venom suit to fight one of the villains, a battle that ends with a few thousands gallons of water spilled in an underground subway tunnel.

It's when he fully becomes the revenge-fueled bad-ass that is shown in all the clips. As he emerges from the underground in a back alley, snarling as he buttons up his regular-guy shirt, he catches an image of his wet, disheveled hair ...

... and parts it into an asymmetrical bob straight out of Emo Hairstyling 101. Or straight out of "Star Trek," where you know it's the evil Spock because he has a soul patch.

He goes from this:

To this:

Black Spidey acts like a pompous jerk, only fully redeeming himself and saving the day when he ditches the venom and the hairstyle.

For shame, "Spider-Man 3," for propagating such emo stereotypes.

(It is a really fun movie, especially considering how superhero sequels with multiple villains usually do. It still doesn't live up to its emotional potential, but it's a comic book movie, not an Amy Tan novel. ...

Also, at one point Pompous Jerk Peter Parker gets into a scuffle at the jazz club where Mary Jane is singing. He turns and accidentally knocks her to the ground. A kid in the theater goes "Is he going to jail now?" The audience did that thing where we laughed, came down from it for a second, then started laughed again. It was hands-down the cutest thing I've seen/heard in weeks.)


OpeningBand said...

this is awesome!

Anonymous said...

А гле здесь Дейви Хэвок??????

Anonymous said...

DUDe, you insult every EMO in earth i hate you same as i do in all this crap life.